Posted by: ~KC~ | July 1, 2008

It’s Like The Crop Circles In My Head…

It was a great long-weekend for food.  Dear lord… Greek, Mexican, Chinese and German/Bavarian foods gallour… It was fabulous.  Add in a little retail therapy (OK… a lot of retail therapy) and it made for a decent weekend, in spite of the weather and the rough start to my long weekend


A rather large cloud of worry was always hanging nearby.  Add in the occasional spurts of hurt, frustration, guilt and anger… and that pretty much summed up my mood.  Which was really too bad because I let it interfere with Lemur King’s and Cruel Wife’s feast prepared for the expected guests.  And although he has asked that I don’t feel guilty – I do feel guilty that I chose to not make an appearance because I allowed myself to wallow.  I have some making up to do … and living fairly nearby, I will be sure to visit shortly.


My father reminded me several times over the weekend that I KNEW he wasn’t going to be on that plane.  But I didn’t want to listen because nothing he had done up until that point would lead me to believe anything other than he WAS going to be on that plane.  And I didn’t want to believe the worst of someone who had not given me any reason to do so – till such time.  And the thing of it is I also believe we won’t hear from him until he is well back in Africa, working.  At least some of us won’t.  I feel it in my bones – he is ‘well’ and alive.


Since his father was no help whatsoever and seemed completely unconcerned – his disappearing act worried me enough to hit up the Tarot cards – they have always helped me locate people before (which is why many have hired me in the past).  Some people are concerned by his silence as well.  So I went where I could get some answers.  And it confirmed everything I felt and believed, plus giving me enough information as to his whereabouts to know that he is alive, breathing and needing space.  Exhaustion is a real bitch.  To keep his privacy … private – I won’t share here what the cards further said.  And although I am still pissed and hurt… I also understand.  Personally – I would have chosen to handle things differentlybut he ain’t me… and I ain’t him.  So there goes all the shudda, cudda, wudda’s… 


We all have our issues that need to be dealt with before anything new can come about.  And the more one fights it… the harder it is to transition into these changes.  It’s inevitable.  It will happen – whether we want it to or not.  Some of us just aren’t nearly graceful enough to understand that and cope accordingly.  Vulnerability is a real bitch – all the way around – no one likes that feeling.  His ‘issues’ brought out buried issues in me as well… that I shudda, cudda, wudda dealt with it differently had I known… but I’m not that graceful.


So… the weekend wasn’t a complete wash.  I had great moments of laughter, my cheeks burned from smiling… despite my mind being elsewhere.  I miss my friend.  Even if he is an ass.  I miss him. A lot.  He’ll come back when he’s ready.  I’ll be here.


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~


Today is Canada Day… Happy Canada Day!!


But I think we got some ‘spleh-nin’ to do… Ugh.


According to this article… we are lagging behind in many many areas – areas in which we once excelled – we’ve become complacent and stagnant.  We are coasting… falling to the back of the gifted class.  Not looking too good.  Here are some of the points made in the article… for full report – read the article.


The annual Conference Board of Canada report card measuring quality of life among 17 advanced countries released Monday concludes that Canada is like a student who started out strong, but is coasting toward the bottom of the class.


Canada’s economy was the envy of the world in the 1970s, ranking third. Now it has fallen to 11th place, behind leader Ireland. And on a per capita basis, individuals in the United States, which ranks seventh, earn $6,400 a year more on average than Canadians.


Canada ranks 15th in environmental performance due to high greenhouse gas emissions and that it produces more garbage per person that any other country in the group. It is ninth in health outcomes, 10th in the society category, and a woeful 13th in innovation with a D grade – not failing, but close.


It does best in educational attainment with a second place behind Finland and a B grade. But its illiteracy rate is worse than a decade ago and while it leads the class in college-level completions, Canada is graduating students in the wrong fields.


Canada underperforms in skills training, produces relatively few PhDs in the sciences, math and engineering, and the scientists it does produce “tend to congregate in research positions that many not be well connected to commercializing activities.”


Canada has been able to do as well as it has over the years mostly due to its abundant natural resource riches and proximity to the world’s richest and largest market, the report says.


“We’ve been lucky more than smart,” said Golden. “We’re doing fine, but we’re coasting and that’s not good enough.”


Canada does very poorly in rates of child poverty, with one of seven children considered under the line and most surprisingly in levels of crime.


For instance, Canada has 17 times the rate of assaults, seven times as many burglaries and three times as many homicides as Denmark.


But even more surprising is that the United States, which is last in the society category, still has fewer burglaries, a lower suicide rate and greater gender equity than Canada.


“It was a shock to me too,” said Golden. “We are much more violent than we think.”


The report notes that Canada is doing well in many areas that contribute to quality of life. Canadians rank high in acceptance of diversity, the ability of individuals to move up the income scale, levels of high school and college graduation, living standards that are rising even if not as fast as many others, and Canadians are healthier than several decades ago.


“The good news is that Canada’s past achievements, such as reducing poverty among its elderly, show that given the political will, Canada could successfully address other social challenges to sustain future quality of life,” the report concludes.



  1. Judging by your food choices, I’m thinking I would love heading out for a weekend of eating with you.

    So sorry it was filled with mixed feelings…

  2. Don’t feel guilty! Life’s too short. We’ll do this again next year, but I’ll just cut down on the number of days to prepare foodstuffs. One day, one BBQ, and one pair of pants ruined from overstretched belly bursting buttons. I’m STILL stuffed. Someone harpoon me and get it over with.

  3. It’s a good thing you’re there and I’m here cause together we could do some major damage!! *drools*

  4. Now I am hungry! For greek, which I can’t buy here I have to attempt to make it. I hate your friend stood you up, but it sounds like you have done what you can. Lastly, please understand, I don’t wish bad for Canada, but some Americans act as though Canada does everything better, this would indicate you are normal, not super human. ; )

  5. @ Leucantha – many even in Canada think we are better than Americans – but the survey says: We’re NOT!!! We are equally as human as our counterparts… and have a different way going about it.

    It is surprising to read the results of such surveys -but it is an eye opener as well. Puts things in perspective. Look – I love my country. But we are FAR from perfect… and have a tainted past and struggles with the present. We are young and impressionable – but not gone-going-gone just yet. Therefore… there’s hope for us afterall!!!

    @ Elizabeth – we should hook up for real… but let me save a bit o’ money first… ’cause from the sounds of it.. albeit FABULOUS – it’ll be EXPENSIVE!!!!

    @ RC – from the sounds of it… if we put a few of us together… it could be a GREAT weekend – all the way around… !!!

    @ LK – meh… let me feel a little guilty for a little while – I’ll be OK. LOL… I feel guilty about missing some good eatin’ from the pictures and sounds of it!!! Dayyyyhum eh?

  6. I have had some not too memorable situations from internet guys. Maybe it is for the best. One guy begged me to come see him and I did. I flew to New York. He was a real jerk when I got there. I flew home the next day.

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